Cover image via STOP Masturbation NOW
Does your child have a masturbation problem?
He or she can't keep their hands off his or her "sinstick"/"sinhole"?
Fret not, your prayers have been answered. The saintly men and women at Stop Masturbation Now have created the Anti-Masturbation Cross®!
Image via STOP Masturbation NOW
This device allows you to let go of that nagging suspicion that your innocent child is "treating their bodies like some kind of perverted amusement park"
Following the wildly popular Anti-Masturbation Cross®, the creators are also introducing the Anti-Masturbation Strait Jacket®!
Image via STOP Masturbation NOW
Critics are calling it the latest in "faith-based self-rape prevention technology"
Protect your little ones from the scourge of self-rape! Get the Anti-Masturbation kit today!
One size fits all, appropriate for children ages 5-16.
Are we serious?
Of course… not. Stop Masturbation Now.org is a satire website, and those anti-masturbation products are obviously not real.
But if you really have a masturbation addiction problem and are seeking help, please click here instead.
May God save your soul.
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