Cover image via SAYS Philippines
What is a Tito?
So [Merriam-Webster](http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/uncle) defines it as…
Time can be unforgiving. If left unchecked, it will rob your youth like a virus, and renaming you into a Tito (Uncle) – a term used in for men who are 'kind of' old.
People born in the 80's and 90's: It's time to check whether you've officially become the new age *[Tito](https://twitter.com/titos_of_manila).*
**NOT this kind of *Tito*:**
**But THIS ONE:**
So what does it take to be a new age Tito? Let us count the ways for you!
1. They come to you for advice
If they don't feel like they can talk to their parents about something, your *pamangkins* (niece or nephew) will come to you for advice if they think you are cool.
2. You love your pamangkins more than anything and you buy them really cool gifts for no reason, or accompany them anywhere
3. "Broke kids" who drink Red Horse make you laugh
4. And why drink somewhere else, when you can drink and bring all your Tito friends at home?
5. And when you're drunk, you sing a lot of Eraserheads, Rivermaya and Parokya ni Edgar songs with other Titos and can even play at least one song with the guitar
6. You love watching reruns of Dragon Ball Z or One Piece (your childhood is awesome because of them)
7. And for you, Pokémon is <3
8. You don't really understand why you need Instagram and Twitter, if you already have Facebook
9. Your dog or cat is like your child
10. And if you don't have a girlfriend, your car or guitar is your 'The One'!
11. You have pictures of you on social media that aren't embarrassing
12. It's totally acceptable to go to bed and stay home at 10 p.m. after spending the whole day working
At some point of life, you'll meet a friend who tells you sleep is for the weak. This guy will be a strong advocate of #YOLO and can usually be found at the Valk VIP area. He will talk you into many skipped lectures and even more hangovers, but it doesn't appeal to you anymore.
13. You like to tell super corny Tito jokes that no one gets…except your fellow Titos
14. When your GF goes shopping, you either wait patiently outside holding the 'other' groceries or shopping with her
15. One of your fave places is the hardware store!
You like shopping for tools, spare parts, and electrical wiring.
16. Your tummy is ballooning without a change in your diet
You know you've eaten less as you count every single calorie. But, for some reason, your tummy gets bigger and bigger. Science can no longer explain what happens; only age does.
17. … and because of that, you grow increasingly concerned about your health
Suddenly, everyone around you is either on a juice cleanse, going for zumba after work, or a yoga master!
18. You buy clothes that shout very Tito
You realized that all your clothes are plain polo-tees, and your slippers are white and blue, you know what is happening.
19. Everyone you know is getting married
'Single Awareness Day' was once scheduled on 14 February, but now that you're a grown-up, Single Awareness Day is every day with internet connectivity to access Facebook.
A wedding proposal with a flash mob caught on camera. A selfie of your ex-girlfriend at a gown-fitting. A picture of your secondary school classmate's newly furnished apartment. Why's everyone growing up?!But if you would excuse me, I will return to making important life decisions, like the sugar level of my bubble tea today.
20. Every surveyor you pass at the MRT or the nearby mall approaches you
Gone are the days where you can easily escape the stealthy eyes of that bank/survey guy just by being a student in your tee and flip flops. Now that you look well put together, the general assumption is that you have everything figured out. You therefore look like you have:
1. Money
2. A desire for a new credit card (and a free luggage while at that)
3. Valuable insights for a 20-minute survey on workers' rights
21. The songs you grew up are being played every Saturday and Sunday on the radio
You used to listen to your parents' favorite stash of ABBA and Bee Gees cassette tapes. 20 years from now, your kids will be asking you why you dig a band named 'Maroon 5' or an artist named 'Lil' Wayne'.
22. You're starting to dig anything vintage!
You know you're young, you dress like one of the kids on TV, with jeans in various states of ripped. You know you're old when you're in a zero-effort outfit and said kids go, "I love your hipster shoes! Where did you get them?"
Your sudden fascination with vinyl records and polaroid cameras, your fashion sense has gone from yay to nay once, out of trend and then back again after its reincarnation. A true mark of age — when you're vintage and didn't even have to try.
23. You speak the adult Tito language
Welcome to full-fledged adulthood! But first, here's a crapload of administrative duties. Like paying your credit card bills and filing income tax.
24. Your keys or cards are pretty organized
25. Lastly is, when someone calls you, "Tito"
Because life isn't all rainbows and butterflies, make sure you have enough to tide through the rainy days that lie ahead too. Once upon a time when your folks took care of your insurance matters, financial planning was a foreign territory. Now, it's about time you take charge and be independent! You're an official part of the 'Tito Club'!
